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I don't know if I'm in the verge of crying, having a mental breakdown, both. Or if I'm already so torn apart that I just don't cry neither break.

It's Monday, April 16th, 2019. 3:00 PM.
It's a vacation week in my country, so I'm fulfilling my role as a lazy teenager, just laying around, watching Netflix and eating junk food. #paradise.

Also I have found myself writing more than usual since I have more free time and less distraction.

One might wonder, don't you have a social media account? Ig? Snap? Fb? Whatsapp to say the least?

Well yeah, I used to have at some point, but I just deactivated them. All of them.

Yes I know what you're thinking. Girl you have depression and now you're closing every social window for help, like, hello this is a warning sign. Get some help ASAP and blah blah blah..

And you know what, you're absolutely right. I did it so no one could reach me, and question me and bother me, making me feel worst instead of actually helping because seriously, I do not need that kind of negativity in my life right now, and that's a lot to say.

Plus, I felt like I needed a break from all of that, y'know. Say whatever you want but even if you're a bohemian person and free spirit and all of that ish. You have also experimented that emptying everytime you get into social media. Because even if you embrace yourself and know your place, you still have a longing for something you just can't reach.